LONDON (The Daily Strawberry) – In a surprise initiative. Prince Charles yesterday called for the next king of England to be black.
“I was disappointed we did not get a black pope this time either,” Prince Charles told BBC News. “We must not let progress stop. We had a black secretary general of the United Nations. We had a black president in America. Britain must do her part in breaking down white privilege. Therefore I propose the next king or queen of England should be black.”
Asked if such a change was realistic, the prince replied: “Britain is falling behind the times. I am sure a black monarch is possible if there is political will.”
Experts on the royal family and constitutional matters were skeptical.
“His Royal Highness is fond of progressive politics,” said Robin Watson of The Times, a leading commentator on royal affairs. “But he seems unaware of the consequences his proposal will have for himself and for his children and grandchildren. They don’t look particularly African, do they?”
In what appeared to be an effort at damage control, Buckingham Palace released a DNA-analysis this morning which it claimed proved Britain already has a black royal family. The study, done by scientists at the Genetic and Genomics Research Institute at the Imperial College in London, showed Prince Charles was 0.05% sub-Saharan African.
“Very recently in evolutionary terms, a mere 50,000 years ago, the prince’s ancestors experienced a Y-chromosome mutation which we have traced to West Africa,” said professor Ya Ling at the Imperial College. “The prince and his offspring still carry this genetic mutation today. And as this mutation only occurred once in human history, and only in this specific region, it proves Prince Charles and his family are black.”